Gratitude Break

Well, here we are after a week of being sick and sore and are reminded - once again - that daily gratitude is harder than it sounds. It requires a certain quantity of graciousness and that can be hard to summon when you feel awful.

Of course, in retrospect, there was a lot to be grateful for in the past week. Doctors and medications and access to both. A corporate policy that allows for the accumulation of sick time and generally good health that means there are plenty of days saved up for when I really need them. A decent work ethic, which also contributes to those days being available for actual sickness. Family and friends who called or wrote with offers of care. Mojo (again) for being an excellent companion. Naps. And of course, David, who made soup and tea and fetched pills and books and blankets and rubbed my back and generally put up with a lot of not-so-gracious behavior from my sick and cranky self.

In an ideal world, I would have remembered to be grateful for all those things as I went along. Something to work towards, for sure.

Best Friends

It's always good to be reminded who your best friend ever is, and why. Tonight, I went to a concert with mine and it was wonderful. Thanks for a beautiful night, Dave.

Homecoming, Redux

Revisiting being grateful for coming home today, for different reasons. Home is good. Home is "in here" instead of "out there." Home is where everybody is always on your side. That hasn't always been the case in my life, but it is now. And that' s a whole lot for which to be grateful.

Homecomings

Today (well, everyday, really) I am grateful for my dog, Mojo, and in particular for the humongous party he throws every time I come home. No matter where I've been or how long I've been gone, my return is cause for joyous celebration.

He barks, he whines, he waggles his head back and forth. He throws his whole self into the air and spins like a top. He races around the house. He is the very essence of exuberance. The party ends only after I have hugged him and petted him and allowed both my hands to be washed. Thoroughly. He's not sure where I go each day, but he's pretty sure I'm getting my hands all icky out there. He takes his clean-up job very seriously.

It is, quite frankly, marvelous. No matter how crappy the work day or the weather, no matter how tired I am or how achy I might be, how could I not love coming home to that?

And, really, look at that face. How could you not love that?

Considering Tomorrow

Today I am thankful for making plans. For looking ahead and choosing to believe the odds are at least even we'll be around when the time comes to go a concert, gather for the holidays, or travel to a wedding. It's hard to walk the very thin line between this moment we know for certain we have and all the moments to come that are just a promise. Every day is a balancing act between being truly present in the moment and being willing to risk hoping for those moments to come. I don't always strike that balance well and it's good to have reminders that good things just might be lurking around the corner.

Here's a reminder that Halloween will come again: Jack and Anna all dressed up in next year's Halloween costumes (because their mom is super smart and bought on sale after trick-or-treat). I'm planning on seeing these costumes hit the road.

Doing Hard Things

Living, I mean really living and not just getting through each day, might just be the hardest thing I do. Some days it's easier than others but no day is easy and remembering why I work so hard at it takes a lot of effort.

So, since it just makes sense to make things easier when you can, I'm going to spend the next sixteen days making a list of things in my life for which I am grateful. Some will be big and some not so much. In no particular order, each will be something that makes me smile, helps to center me, and keeps me moving in a generally forward direction.

Today's thing, first on my list, are my nieces and nephews; Britt's precious cousins. For those of you who don't know, I have six brothers and sisters (three of each) and among them they have twelve beautiful children. I used to dream of being an only child, but Britt did not love it. She was fortunate, though, to live close to some of her cousins and to get to visit the others. She adored her Capital C Cousin, Christopher. They were inseparable for most of their childhoods. She loved to talk about the weekend she spent at college with her cousin Amanda, and the time she went to Elizabeth City and her cousin Sean took her to coffee shop called "Muddy Waters." She went on a cruise with her cousins Bobby and Megan and her oldest cousin Susan's college graduation made her cry. Her little cousin Anna, born just a few months before her high school graduation, stole her heart. She never met her littlest cousin, Jack; he'll be two next week.

She loved her cousins with a fierceness that, not being an only child, I never quite understood. I love them, too, and am grateful for all the ways they remind me - every day - that good things continue to happen and that time, and I, must keep moving.

And, since no post is complete without at least one picture, here's one of my favorites: Britt as Bridesmaid to her cousin Amanda, in September of 2004.